there was once upon a time and long ago a girl called Mabel who had a mother called Mabel they wanted to have some soup for tea but that was pretty confusing so most people just called them Mabel and Mom being the mother Mabel and Mabel being the other Mabel is that clear? no? too bad cut we’ve got a story to do so we’re moving on now Mabel and Mom were happy as happiness goes but they were poor so ever so much very much poor that they sometimes had very little to eat luckily Mom had a very special skill making collectible figurines she made civil war chess sets dolls of popular personalities of the day and those cute this is my seventh story on the list big eyed babies who make you go aww so it was that one day through the woods to try and some of her Mom’s figurines at the market a little fairy appeared in front of her she was called Mary when a strange old lady jumped out at her from behind a tree and said howdy she was so surprised that she dropped the box of figurines all of which shattered into four thousand and sixty six pieces on the ground oh sorry about that said the old lady didn’t mean to scare you oh no said Mabel Oh no!” said Mabel. all of the collectible figurines my Mom made have broken not all of them this one is still intact the old lady picked up the one unbroken figurine looked at its big eyes went aww and said tell you what just so that there’s no hard feelings I’ll buy this one from right now that’s nice of you but it won’t be enough we won’t be able to buy food with $4.99 plus taxes hum I see what you mean how about this instead of money I’ll trade you something very useful lemme see what have I got that will be ah I know and from a surprising deep pocket in her coat the old lady pulled out a food processor the land was very flat but not just any food processor she said it’s a magic food processor and it makes the most delicious food in the whole wide world Yummy Happy Good Time soup Yummy Happy Good time soup? that’s right here lemme show yak here the old lady took out a bowl from the same pocket and put it under the dispenser of the food processor and said yummy happy good time soup keep on cooking till you’re pooped and just like that the little gears inside the food processor started turning and out from the dispenser poured thick creamy soup the best Mabel had ever tasted it kept on pouring out until the old lady said yummy happy time soup one more bite and my tummy will droop now Mom and I will have plenty of food forever and ever thank you so much miss sorry what was your name? oh shucks I’m just a crazy old witch who lives in the woods but you can call me Mabel It was the middle of the story now hey that’s my name too and my Mom’s well what a small world this is you’d almost think it was some kind of fairy tale well so long and she left just as oddly and mysterious as she had appeared and she left just as oddly and mysterious as she had appeared Mom was surprised when Mabel came home so soon but she showed her the wonderful magical food processor the old lady had given her she got out two bowls and said yummy happy good time soup keep on cooking till you’re pooped and just as the bowls filled with the delicious soup and would have kept going if Mabel hadn’t said yummy happy good time soup one more bite and my tummy will drop at which point it obediently stopped producing soup so from that day on Mabel and Mom had plenty of food and would never go hungry again about a year went by and Mabel got to that age where young girls like to go out at night one night she was on a date and Mom was home alone and felt a little hungry now normally Mabel used the magical food processor Mom had never tried it by herself but she figured she’d heard it enough times to know how the rhyme went or she thought supper yummy happy soup Super no that’s not right it’s happy yummy gooey hooey gooey creepy cooky itsy Betsy Teenier Weenie er yummy happy good time soup keep on cooking till you’re pooped I got it yes she sure did and the food processor began to dispense its wonderful soup and once Mom’s bowl was full she tried to say the rhyme to make it stop but by now had forgotten the words again as she tried every combination of silly words she could think of the food processor just kept dispensing soup it overflowed the bowl and poured onto the table then it went over the table and onto the floor soon it was pooling on the floor and before she knew Mom was standing on the table which had become an island in a lake of soup before too much longer Mabel came home from her date and opened the front door of her house at which point the soup burst through the door and into the street it surrounded the entire house like a moat before Mabel was able to get to the food processor and say yummy happy good time soup one more bite and my tummy will droop and just as quickly as it had begun and just as it stopped dispensing soup well the bad news was that their house was pretty much ruined by now the good news is that the old Lady witch Mabel had put a phone number on the back of the food processor which said Questions comments or concerns? please call so Mabel called the number