Once upon a time, there was a man named Cranky Charlie who lived in Charleston. Cranky Charlie was always cranky because everything in his life began with the letter C. His wife was Cathy, their kids were Chase and Chelsey and the dog was Chuck. He lived in Charleston, California in the Crenshaw neighborhood.
Now, Cranky Charlie loved holidays. The only thing that made him happy was Thanksgiving dinner and yep, you guessed it – his favorite meal was corn on the cob and Cranberries. Cathy had to make Cranberry soup, Cranberry Cornbread, Cranberry drink….just Cranberry everything. After dinner, Cranky Charlie sat in his creepy chair to watch the Macyś Thanksgiving Parade when a commercial came on the television.
¨Would you like to sail around the world on the Cranberry Cruise Ship? If so, you should enter the drawing at the CVS, you might be our next winner or, call 1-800-CRANBERRY within the next five minutes to get your one-way, VIP ticket on this awesome cruise.¨ Cranky Charlie jumped out of the chair so fast that he made Chuck, the dog cringe in fear. Charlie yelled, ¨Cathy, pack my bag and don´t forget my cranberry heels…Iḿ gonna win this cruise.¨
Charlie called the number and got the busy signal. ¨What in Godś Creation is happening, I know nobody wants to be on the cruise more than me.¨ He kept hanging up and calling back until finally, a manś voice said, ¨you are our lucky winner! If you can be on the corner of Charming and Cherry in the next ten minutes, you will get to go on a cruise of a lifetime. Now Cathy and the kids were not invited but they were secretly happy because they were over the cranberries in their life – heck, Cathy called Cranky Charlie a Cab, gave him a kiss and said, ¨C-ya later.¨
Charlie told the cab driver to ¨crank it up buddy, I got a cruise to catch.¨ The Cab driver drove so fast that he almost missed the sign that read: ¨drop him here.¨ Charlie hit the jackpot! He won the cruise. CBS was there to cover the story and Cranky Charlie could not be happier. When he got to the ship, he was in cranberry heaven. Cranberry carpet, cranberry drapes, even the glass of champagne was cranberry. Charlie had his own cabin and everything was cranberry….the sheets, the towels, even the bed was the shape of a cranberry. The room service menu had cranberries featured in every meal. The cruise sailed to the Caribbean Islands. He had Cranberry Coconuts, Cranberry Curry Chicken, and Cranberry Cornbread! He even learned to speak the local language Cranglish. ¨Wow, all my dreams came true! But did they? Charlie thought he was jumping into the Cranberry ocean when he heard a loud noise and then Cathy screamed…..¨Charlie, get off the floor, youŕe scaring the dog.¨
Cranky Charlie was DREAMING of a Cranberry Cruise!